12 Step Planet - Lauren O.
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Stories about addiction and recovery, Clean and Sober life styles
My name is Lauren I'm an alcoholic and an addict. My sobriety date is June 18, 2010. Growing up my life was very chaotic, there was a lot of yelling and fighting in my household, it is only through the grace of this program and the twelve steps I am able to look back today and appreciate that my parents were doing the best they could and love them for that. I was always a loner very anxious always needing to know exactly what was going to happen next and if plans would change I would lose my mind. My first addiction was an eating disorder I developed around the age of ten and kept secret all the way through high school, which managed to distract me well enough until it didn't anymore which led me to my first drunk. The night I graduated high school, I spent the next 3 years chasing that feeling of calmness and inner peace. The downward spiral was rapid within months I had failed out of college, crashed 2 cars, started my rounds in detoxes rehabs and psych units. I got my first dose of AA when I was 20 when the facility I was living in had mandated that I go to meetings but I was not willing to surrender so for two months I sat in meetings (next to my sponsor) and changed nothing. I relapsed on my 21st birthday. And this time was worse than the last. Drugs entered the picture, I was blacking out daily... I grew to hate myself. And it continued to get worse until the fateful day of November 18, 2008. I was driving to the bar, already drunk and high crashed my car and was arrested and charged with a DUI. Finally something I couldn't get out of. This was it. The judge mandated AA, or jail time. I chose AA I was broken and finished. So on June 18 I crawled back into these rooms and have never looked back, my life today is a miracle. I am a miracle.I found a sponsor immediately and jumped right into the steps. I have made plenty of mistakes in my recovery but the most important thing is that i dont pick up a drink or drug today. The life this program has given me is one I could never have picked for myself in my wildest dreams it has taken work lots of it but it has all been worth it. Thank you for letting me share  xoxo